Found this browsing myspace.

Got a chuckle out of it.



brill, baby!

We revelled in our own glory.....

as we gave birth.....to one kick ass idea!

Geez, what genius. Taking an industrial robot and turning it into a ride.

Damn, why am I not DVR'n Family Guy

This is cartoon gold! Gold I tell you!

Geez, I must be a serious freak!

My studio mate and I just went to a local pub to eat dinner. The waitress is this really cute, friendly girl with a nice smile, bright demeanor, the whole nine yards. When she came to our table, she seemed to enthusiasticly greet my friend. She had an effervescence in her interaction with him.

When it came time to take my order, her demeanor takes a 180 degree turn. It seems like it's the most painful chore she has ever had to endure. I consider myself a very intuitive person. Being an artist/animator has helped me develop a deep understanding of body language. I'm not ever oblivious to my surroundings. I pick up on the most subtle vibes.

And this young woman definitely turned to ice with me. I usually don't let it bother me because I've got more important things to worry about than what people think of me. Lately, though, I've become more sensitive to it. Especially where women are concerned. Intimate relationships haven't been the most important thing in my life. I've always lived my life with an "I'm alone but not lonely" state of mind. Creative fulfillment was always more important to me than pursuing relationships.

It's been so long, though, since I've had a relationship with someone, I feel like I've slipped into this comfort zone where it's easier to just fill my day up with artistic pursuits than to go out and meet people. And if I stay in that zone too much longer, I'm really afraid that I won't be able to dig myself out of it. It's a frightening concept to think of myself ten years from now and see the same guy in the same situation. I definitely don't want that. It scares the fuck out of me.

But I really don't know what to do to change it around. I might as well be a damn virgin again considering as little dating I've done since my last committed relationship. I wouldn't know the first thing about dating woman now. I'm usually a quiet person. That's a big strike against me it seems. I've got a lot to say when confronted, but I hardly ever initiate conversations. I think it's a confidence issue. I'm very confident when it comes to things I know I'm good at doing. But social situations bring out the weakest aspects of my personality.

I assume that the problem is ME. I've felt for a long time that I just don't have anything to offer someone. It's definitely a supreme drag. And every situation where I tried to put myself out there, it's been nipped in the bud before it even gets started. I'm back in that hole, screaming at the top of my lungs "what the hell is wrong with me!!!" and there are no answers.

So tonight the hole was dug just a little deeper. I tried to be friendly and smile, but it didn't work. I'm sure I came off forced and insincere. I feel like this is the response that I am destined to receive from every woman I ever try to interact with. I think my studio mate has a very light aura about him. Smiling comes effortlessly to him. He deflected my compliment that he's "easy to interact with" by saying something self effacing like "they just see me as the nice uncle". If that's the case, then they must see me as the sex offender uncle.

I just can't seem to stop digging and digging.

I wonder, am I hopeless at this point? What does my future hold for me? Right now, it doesn't look too bright. Well, at least where women are concerned.

It's not a completely negative story. I think creatively I'm in the best place I've ever been. In my recent past, I've fought with feelings of hatred for the artist in me. Everyday was a struggle with creative apathy and loathing. But the last few years have been a re-awakening for me. I love it again like I used to when I was younger. But I know that it can't be the only thing that sustains me in life. I can see the vicious cycle that I will fall into if I don't change my ways. I will have to find a happy balance. It's imperative.

:)

Winnie from Wonder Years......

......math genius.

San Diego Comic-Con 2005

I went down to the SDCC05 to exhibit and sell a sketchbook. Sold a good number at the show before I had to take off on saturday. My friend Eric did relatively well. He's still down there now hopefully selling away.

I've still got a bunch of sketchbooks to sell. $10.00 USD gets you 64 pages of hot girl and robot action in full color. Price includes shipping.

Check out some amateur photos of sculptures and not much else here:

My sketchbook is in the hizzouse!

Got it back today. With all humility, I think it's bombtacular!!

The Millenial Generation Pornographers.

More power to the shoe gazers and their desire to get their freak on....on camera.

This here's the poster boy for the emo pornographer set:

EonMcKai